Love, A Disorder
by thankyou.milk.cow
Summary: Mental hospitals are Hinata's home. Without a family, she goes from hospital to hospital, transferring whenever she develops bonds with others. But when she meets Gaara, she finds herself unwilling to leave. GaaHina
1. Chapter 1

"U-Uh, e-excuse me?" Hinata Hyuuga's voice trembled as she strove to keep up with her two "escorts" with the heavy iron chains hindering her movements. One of the two police officers turned around and shot her a look that silenced her right away.

"Well, now. That's just plain rude. Let's make sure they _can't _ignore us," Raku whispered in her ear. "Just let me handle this, ok?"

Hinata retreated to the back of her mind as Raku stepped forward to take the reins. She was still aware of everything, but it was more of a passenger seat view. Raku was in the driver's seat now.

"C-can you t-t-tighten th-these?" Hinata's innocent voice stuttered over the request. "We're getting a little antsy here, and I don't want to cause trouble for anyone."

_Shit. _Hinata prayed the two guards wouldn't notice their lack of a stutter in that last sentence. The larger one approached them, not noticing anything wrong, while the other pulled out a taser. _You're so good at it, _she whispered to Raku.

_Of course I am, _Raku's voice echoed back. _I've got to take care of you. _The guard leaned toward them and their eyes zeroed in on the key that was barely secured to his belt. Without the slightest hint of what she was going to do, Raku swung their fists up to hit him on the side of his head.

He crumpled to the floor, and before the other guard had time to react, their feet were unlocked as they sprinted towards the gate, which was already closing.

Raku pumped their legs faster. They had to reach the gate. Right as they were gathering their legs to leap under the gate, something sharp struck her in the back of the leg. Almost instantly, they felt the effects.

Hinata knew Raku was trying to stay in control even though she knew they couldn't escape. Tranquilizers always made her sick, and Raku knew that. She was trying to protect her. Protect her from her weaknesses, from the world. That was why she had come to Hinata in the first place.

As they sank into oblivion, Hinata was aware of Raku, still in control, fighting valiantly to keep her safe.

**

"Gaara. Time for your medicine." Gaara had to refrain from striking out and smacking that obnoxious tray with those stupid pills and that godforsaken cup of water on it. Shizune stood in front of him with that horrible fake smile she always wore.

_Just smack it. You know you want to. _Gaara's head whipped around to where Shukaku was sprawled lazily across a plushy loveseat, giving him a mischievous smile. _Come on. It's not like she's just going to stand there waiting for you to do it._

Gaara turned back to the nurse and, without warning, sent the hated tray and all its contents flying. Satisfaction hummed through him as Shizune yelped and scurried to pick up all the scattered items.

"Now look, Gaara. You take these pills RIGHT NOW! Or you'll have to take them by syringe," Shizune spat, glaring daggers at him. Everyone else in the rec room stopped what they were doing and stared at him. Those idiots acted as though he'd never had an outburst before.

Sighing, he snatched the pills from her outstretched hand and tossed them into his mouth. After she was satisfied that he'd swallowed, Shizune latched her hand onto his shoulder and she steered him out of the room.

Shikamaru, who'd fallen asleep halfway through the ordeal, woke with a start and looked around, asking what was going on. Stupid narcoleptic.

When they reached the room he shared with Sasuke, Gaara was infinitely relieved he wasn't there. Shizune shoved him inside and slammed the door, locking him in. Shukaku was gone, courtesy of those stupid little pills that had been practically shoved down his throat.

Whipping out a pack of cigarettes, he stomped over to the window and lit one, inhaling deeply before blowing the smoke out through the thick steel bars. Something caught his eye down below and he watched as two guards let a new "guest" up the main path.

Suddenly, the girl called out to her guards in a timid voice and one stalked back to her, only to be knocked out by a well-aimed swing of her cuffed hands. As the other yelled out in alarm, the violet haired girl swept up the fallen keys and had her feet unlocked in one smooth motion.

Then she was off, darting back to the gate, which was shutting at a rapid speed. She was just preparing for a leap that would have her free when the second guard managed to peg her with his tranq gun. The girl sank to the ground, her eyes drifting shut.

The guard walked over and swung the sleeping girl over his shoulder. He turned and headed towards the building that Gaara had both loved and hated for years.

Hn. Finally something new happened, just as he was getting bored. Gaara took another drag on his cigarette and smirked as he watched his exhaled smoke curl away into the dusk.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey everyone. Ok I'm feeling pretty G that I got like two replies. I did a dork dance=]**

**Ok Hinata's not really the one with the backbone it's more Raku who's the badass**

**So here's the next chapter. Bon apetite.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Forgot to add this to my first chapter. Ya, I'm naughty like that.  
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**Chapter Two**

_Hinata…it's time to wake up. _Hinata slowly blinked, disoriented at being launched back into her body. Raku smiled weakly in her mind, and she felt gratitude flood her as she realized how much effort she'd put into protecting her from the tranquilizers.

"Oh, good, you're awake. You know, you shouldn't pull stunts like that, it only gets them pissed." The voice above their head was happy and upbeat, which was anything but what Hinata and Raku were feeling.

_Hinata, I'm so sorry I couldn't save us. I wasn't fast enough. _In her mind's eye, Hinata saw Raku hang her head in shame. She sighed. Raku was so protective of her, she hated when she couldn't do everything to keep them safe.

_It's fine. Who is this boy? I trust you've been paying attention? _The boy in question stared at Hinata, as if expecting something. He had clear blue eyes and the most yellow hair they had ever seen. Wait, what did he want? He must have asked them something…

"Oh, I-I'm so-sorry-"_Naruto _"-N-N-Naruto. I- I wasn't p-paying at-ten-tention." _Thanks Raku. That was a close save. So what has happened since you took over? _As Raku filled her in, Hinata listened intently, only half listening to Naruto's happy ramblings.

A woman walked into the room, interrupting Naruto's babbling and Hinata and Raku's conversation. She strode over to the couch where they were and shooed the blonde boy before turning to Hinata. "Hello, there. I'm Shizune-" fake smile"-I understand you caused some trouble on your way in. That will not be happening again. You see, we function a little differently than you're used to. Everything runs smoothly here, and you have plenty of freedom. In exchange for cooperation."

They hated her almost instantly. That fake smile especially. How could this woman even act like she was happy here? But Hinata simply bowed their head and said demurely, "I u-understand."

"Excellent." Shizune smiled. "Let me show you around. I'm sure you'll love everyone." And with that, Hinata was whisked away. After being shown around, Hinata frowned as they walked towards the rec room.

_Raku? Are you alright? _She hadn't heard from her friend the whole time that they'd been walking around. Normally the girl had something to say that would make their lips curl in amusement at a joke only they could hear.

_I'm fine. Forgive me, but I need to rest. _Relief flooded through their body as Hinata felt Raku fading to a barely-there presence, shutting down in order to regain her strength. Hinata didn't have time to gather her wits before they entered the rec room and Shizune called out to get everyone's attention.

"Everyone, this is Hinata. She's a new guest and I want you all to treat her with kindness and respect." Guest? That was a bit much, but Hinata brushed it off as she was left alone in the room with strangers, all of whom were looking at her.

She was relieved when a familiar face stood out in the crowd and she slowly made her way over to him.

"H-hi, Narut-to," she said quietly, hoping he would introduce her to someone, anyone, to avoid the awkwardness.

He smiled at her. "Hiya, Hinata! Want me to introduce you to everyone?" She nodded hesitantly as he dragged her over to a couch cramped with people and stood in front of the TV they'd been staring at. Over the loud protests he said, "Guys, this is Hinata, the new 'guest.'" He said the word mockingly, probably thinking as much of it as she did.

He went through the introductions pointing them out from left to right. Ino sat on the arm of the sofa, her long blond hair up in a ponytail and her cleavage thrust out into a black-haired boy's face. He was Sasuke, and he sighed in annoyance and shoved her away. The pink-haired Sakura on the other side of him sighed dreamily as she stared up into his face. All Hinata could see of the next guy was his chin, his head tilted back so he could sleep as he snored softly. The rest of the space was dominated by a fat boy named Chouji, who munched on chips, not even acknowledging her existence.

"Hey, Naruto, bring her over here!" a brunette boy called from across the room, waving madly. They walked over to him and another boy with black hair, his face completely expressionless. "I'm Kiba, and this is Sai. Don't expect anything from him, he's completely apathetic. I've got Panic Disorder and Paranoid Personality Disorder."

Apparently he was the one with all the information on the other patients in this place. "Wh-who e-e-else d-do y-you know ab-bout?" Hinata enquired, trying to sound nonchalant.

"Well, Ino is anorexic and bulimic. And Sasuke's got some sort of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, watched his brother kill his whole family or something." Kiba waved a hand dismissively, as if it didn't matter. "That kid Chouji, he eats his feelings, which is weird, 'cause I though only girls did that. Well anyway, Sakura cuts. A lot."

"O-oh. I-I see," Hinata said somewhat halfheartedly. "A-are there o-o-others?" Hinata twiddled her fingers nervously.

"Hey! Don't forget me Kiba! I'm a kleptomaniac," he announced proudly. "You better keep all your stuff hidden or your door locked."

"Shut up, Naruto, you're scaring her. Yes, there are a few more people, but I'm sure you'll met them at dinner. You should go check out your room."

Sakura appeared at Hinata's shoulder and the violet-haired girl jumped in fright.

"You and I will share a room," she said, smiling at the frightened girl. "Come on, I'll show you." As they walked through the hallways, the pinkette chattered incessantly, but Hinata was barely listening, only adding a small comment here and there to satisfy the girl. "Well, here we are."

Sakura opened the door they had stopped in front of and the pair stepped inside. Flipping on a light switch, the pinkette said, "Your bed's bare now, but I'll get you some sheets and stuff and you'll be good to go. I'm gunna go hang out in the rec room, wanna come?"

"N-no thanks, Sa-Sa-Sakura. I'm g-going t-to lay d-down." As the pink-haired girl finally left, Hinata shut the door, and dropped her bag on the bad. She stared out the window for a few moments before swiping a pack of cigarettes from her back and heading off to find the garden Shizune had shown her earlier.

Raku was still asleep, and she had time to kill, so why not indulge in her only guilty pleasure?

Finally finding the garden-which was actually more of a huge fenced in pasture with a lake and rolling green hills than a garden-Hinata walked over to the pier that extended into the lake and settled down on the sun-warmed wood.

She pulled out a Camel and lit up, drawing the smoke deep into her lungs before exhaling it all in one steady stream of grey.

Thumping steps warned her of someone else's presence, and she turned to see a red-haired boy with cyan eyes surrounded by heavy black rings around them heading straight in her direction. She turned to flee, but realized she was at the edge of the pier.

She was trapped.

**

Gaara left his room shortly after witnessing the violet-haired girl's near escape. For some reason he couldn't identify, he was dying to meet her.

_Calm down, _Shukaku ordered. _She's on the pier. _Every psychologist he'd ever spoken to had told him Shukaku was just someone summoned up by his imagination, but if that was true, how did he know things Gaara didn't?

As Gaara headed towards the "backyard"-the thing was more of a ranch, really-he took several detours to avoid the others. He had to get to her as fast as he could.

When he finally burst out the back door and onto the deck, he was surprised to see the girl sitting serenely at the edge of the pier, a cloud of smoke disappearing above her head.

He strode over, anxious to meet this strange enigma who promised a reprieve from the monotony of this hellhole. His steps reverberated through the wood as he walked down the pier, and the girl's back stiffened. She whipped her head around to look at him, and then turned back as if to flee, her violet hair tumbling and glistening in the sun. He ached to bury his hands in it to see if it was as silky as the sun painted it.

"You're new." The girl flinched at his low, husky voice as if she'd been expecting a shout.

"Y-yes," she stuttered, and then looked meekly down at her hands. What happened to the girl who had taken out that idiot guard Gai and then made a break for the exit? Had he imagined the whole thing?

"Why are you stuttering? I saw you; saw what you're capable of. You can't be weak!" For some reason he was incredibly pissed off that he'd come all this way only to have his expectations unfulfilled.

The girl's silver eyes hardened. God, they were captivating. How could he not have noticed them before? "Sorry to disappoint," she snarled at him, then looked shocked and touched her fingers to her lips as if wondering if that remark had come from her.

"…may I join you?" Gaara inquired, hoping to learn more about this mystery girl. She nodded and he sank into a sitting position beside her.

She held out a box of cigarettes to him. "Hinata." He watched her lips form the words, the sound echoing inside his head.

"Gaara." He carefully withdrew one and held it to his mouth, leaning forward to catch the tip on the lighter she'd extended.

_Hinata, Hinata, Hinata._

Gaara started a tiny bit and glanced around for Shukaku when he heard the voice in his head. He hadn't noticed him before. He took a long drag from the cigarette.

Without looking at her startled face he said, "Schizophrenia." Out of the corner of his eye he saw her exhale smoke into the warm air.

_Hinata, Hinata, Hinata._

"Multiple personality disorder." Her voice whispered across his skin, soothing and burning at the same time. Goosebumps broke out on his arms. Multiple personality disorder, huh? Well that explained the change in character.

_Hinata, Hinata, Hinata._

What was this? A weakness. One that needed to be crushed. He would stop reacting like this, even if he had to spend all his time with her to do it. Shukaku's constant whispering in his mind wasn't helping either.

"So what is everyone else like here?" Was she trying to torture him with that haunting lullaby of a voice? It seemed so, as she was speaking far too much.

_Hinata, Hinata, Hinata._

"Hn. Idiots. Hate them." He tried to keep it brief, not wanting to prompt any more questions from that sinful voice box of hers. _Shut up, Shukaku._

She lay back, sighing. "They're all right." He turned to look at her, not understanding the last part. As he watched, she smiled serenely. Her face was glowing in the sun and all that violet hair was splayed out on the wood.

_Hinata, Hinata, Hinata._

_Shut up, you bastard. _The reprimand was halfhearted. Gaara was captivated. He watched as she took a drag on her cigarette before flicking away the ash and grinding it out on the pier next to her.

Suddenly she stood up and stretched. "Nice meeting you, Gaara, but I'm kind of jet-lagged from my trip. I'll see you around."

Gaara stared after her as she strolled away. She had such a beautiful body, and she moved like a ballerina. He wanted to run after her and press himself against her, to feel those lush curves as he buried his face in her hair.

_Hinata, Hinata, Hinata._

Catching himself with those foolish thoughts, he growled, "Shut up, Shukaku. I don't need this bullshit right now."

Receiving no answer, he glanced around and was surprised to find that his friend was nowhere to be found.

As he himself started to make his way back to the hospital, he vaguely realized that Shukaku wasn't there, his presence suppressed by the meds he had swallowed earlier.

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**Ok, kiddies, just wanna clear some stuff up. 1)This is a mental health hospital(duh obvious) **

**2)Hinata and Raku are the same person, kinda. They share a body which belongs to Hinata mainly, but like Raku is her friend/figment of her imagination conjured up to help her through tough times **

**3)Shukaku=not a demon. A person conjured up by Gaara, just like the whole Hinata/Raku thing, except Shukaku's got his own body and can't manifest himself, only influence Gaara's behavior. Rest assured, Gaara is still a total badass. **

**4) I will be adding like two more people. **

**5)I'ma just gunna do the whole switch between Gaara's and Hinata's point of view thing ok? Or if you gots any other ideas I'm open to criticism. Maybe another young love type deal goin down in the hospital? Whatever. Drop me a line. Ha. I'm a loser.**


	3. Chapter 3

**kaitlen inuzuka: No I didn't mean that you wouldn't get it I was just like tying up the loose ends so no one was confused. I really hate it when someone writes a story that just kinda makes no sense at all.**

**Jitchoo: You mean R in terms of violence or sexual content or what? I mean sure I'll change it I guess just give me something to work with and I'll see what I can do. The customer is always right or whatever.**

**Awesome. Third chapter! K so it might start taking me a bit to update, what with school and all that bullshit going on but I'll do my best. Bon apetite.**

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**_Chapter Three_**

Hinata's mind was a buzz of activity as she made her way back to their room to rest. She couldn't believe that redhead! Just coming up to her and insulting her like that.

However, it hadn't escaped her notice how she'd almost immediately relaxed around him. She'd even lost her stutter. Only Raku could cure her of that little speech impediment, a result of intense shyness.

Or so they'd thought. A small smile appeared on her lips as she remembered how they'd sat in companionable silence before starting up a light conversation. She hadn't even had to depend on Raku to overcome her fear of the stranger, which was good because she was resting peacefully in the back of their mind. It was rare that Raku got to take a break, and Hinata was glad that her friend was finally getting some relaxation time.

As she opened her door and stepped into the room, Hinata smiled to see that Sakura had kindly dressed her bed for her. She slipped underneath the sheets and closed her eyes.

**

Gaara stay on the pier until the sun went down; the now finished cigarette still perched between his fingers. He thought about the girl. _Hinata._ She was interesting all right.

When he'd first seen her she'd beaten the shit out of Gai; the ridiculously upbeat guard had crumpled when her fists had made contact. Then, when he'd first approached her, she'd been shy and nervous, before finally relaxing in his presence and even shutting her eyes.

No one shut their eyes around Gaara. He was too volatile; people preferred to have him in their sight at all times.

But the girl. She was…interesting, to say the least. Something deep inside of his was drawn to her, wanted to find out more about her. She'd said she had multiple personality disorder. How many other sides did she have? And what were they like? Probably nothing like her. He'd heard that when a person had different personalities, they were manifestations of everything that person was not.

A vicious scowl appeared on Gaara's face as he realized he'd been thinking about the girl, wondering about her. He snarled low as memories attacked him.

_~Flashback~_

_Gaara doubled over, clutching his head as Shukaku whispered insidious things in his ear. He was a slave to those ideas. His doctor had told him he was getting better, and he'd believed it, but he'd just been lying to himself. Gaara knew that he could never control Shukaku._

"_Gaara?" the sweet voice floated through the haze of his violent rage, stopping him for a second. He turned and stared at the girl before him before Shukaku's whispers breached his mind again. Rain pounded the windows, muffling the sound of her voice._

"_Run," he bit out._

_The girl ignored his orders and stepped forward, her hands reaching out to touch his face. "No, Gaara, let me help you," she pleaded gently. Did she want to die?_

_The second her fingertips made contact with his face, he lost all control. He realized he'd never even had it in the first place. He roared and leaped at her, fingers closing tightly around her throat. A clap of thunder dulled the noise, but he could still hear the small choking cry she gave when he grabbed her._

_She couldn't scream, he was crushing her windpipe. Her black eyes stared up at him, pleading with him. A red haze descended over his vision and he screamed in anger as he watched her eyes go flat._

More, want more. _Shukaku moaned in his head at the heady sensation of her life leaving her. The nurses came rushing in at the sound of his yells and gasped, horrified at what they were witnessing._

_It took all of them to drag him off her body, and even more to hold him down to keep him from killing them as they forced the needle into his skin._

_~End Flashback~_

With labored breathing, the red-haired boy groaned in agony, not wanting to remember. He would never let anything like that ever happen again.

Pain lanced through his chest as an image of his precious one's eyes, flat and empty, flashed through his mind.

He clutched the edge of the pier, doubled over in pain. Large splinters of wood pierced his palms and he watched through glazed eyes while his blood dripped into the dark water of the lake.

**

After a long, blissful sleep, Hinata rose, arching their back and stretching like a contented cat. Sakura stared at them from her own bed.

"Wh-what i-is I it-t-t?" Hinata stuttered out, barely able to speak, she was so uncomfortable with the attention. She glanced down at their body. They was wearing nothing but a pair of oversized black sweats and a grey tank top that wasn't exactly modest. It didn't show anything, but it was a hell of a lot more than Hinata wanted to show.

Raku had packed for them.

"Nothing, you're just really pretty is all." Flushing, Hinata barely managed to gasp out a thanks before Sakura dragged her out of bed and towards the cafeteria. "Breakfast."

When they reached the large room, Hinata glanced around. The dark one, Sasuke was sitting by himself with Ino already hovering over his shoulder, flirting. Sakura took one look and darted over to defend him from Ino's temptress ways.

"Hey, Hinata! Over here!" Naruto waved at her from across the room. As she walked over, they passed Gaara, who was eating a piece of toast and drawing something with a charcoal pencil.

She stumbled as she passed him, and was mortified when she had to catch herself on his table. Their face was probably beet red by now. She quickly straightened and hurried over to where Naruto was sitting with Chouji, who was already on his third plate of food, Shikamaru, Sai, Kiba, and a blonde girl Hinata had never seen before.

_Who is she, Raku?_

_I'm not sure. I didn't see her yesterday. Speaking of yesterday, why was I not informed of your little encounter with Mr. Strong and Silent over there? You go, girl. _Raku was smirking in Hinata's head while she sifted through yesterdays memories, catching up on what had happened while she slept.

Hinata blushed bright pink. _I-it was nothing. _Crap. Now Raku would know something was up.

_Aw, baby girl, you never stutter in here. Someone's got a cru-u-ush, _her bold friend sing-songed in their head. They continued to banter back and forth about yesterday's interaction while Naruto introduced the blond girl.

"This is Temari. Anger management," he informed her. "She's a real psycho." The girl in question's fist connected with Naruto's cheek and he fell of his chair.

She turned to smile at the frightened girl. "Hi, there." Hinata shrank back from her, afraid of invoking her wrath. "So what've you got going in that pretty little head of yours? Probably anxiety from the looks of things."

"N-n-n-n-no," Hinata barely managed to get the word out of her shaking form. She was terrified.

Naruto climbed back into his chair and grinned at her. "I'm fine, Hinata. See? Good as new." He spread his arms sp she could inspect him.

"You won't be if you don't give me back my shoe," Temari growled. Huh? _How did he steal her shoe?_

_I don't know, but I'm definitely going to be keeping an eye on him. _Raku thought about their few meager possessions back in their room, already contemplating how to keep them safe. She was such a good friend.

Suddenly, Naruto perked up. He waved madly to someone who had just entered. "Neji! Tenten! What took so long? I think I know!" The hyperactive blond waggled his eyebrows provocatively, but that wasn't why Hinata stiffened.

_Neji..._They knew a Neji. Hinata's heart lurched with fear. Raku, not so much. The very name was like a curse to her. It was the whole reason she loved and cared for Hinata. _I-it c-c-can't b-be h-him. R-right, Raku?_

_No, of course not, there are plenty of people with the name Neji. It's probably just some loser, _Raku reassured her, even though in she herself was unsure. But she didn't want to scare he best friend. _ Relax, it's fine._

For some reason, the two still turned to see the people standing at the door. Hinata's heart nearly stopped from terror.

"Neji…" she whispered.

Raku rushed to the front of her mind, pushing Hinata back as she took control, protecting the cowering Hinata from the only person the poor girl had ever hated. She leaped out of her chair, fists clenched; face a twisted mask of hatred.

"Neji!" she roared.

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**FUCKING. EPIC. CLIFFHANGER. I don't wanna toot my own horn but I thought it was pretty damn gasp-worthy.**

**Oh, I just wanna let you guys know that the whole Gaara/Hinata romance deal might take a while because, as you can tell in the flashback, Gaara is a little bit...Shit I don't want to say scared but that's all that comes to mind. Ok got it. Hesitant. He's a wee bit hesitant to start a relationship so bear with me when he keeps rejecting Hinata, so she eventually turns to another man(for a bit). *Waggles eyebrows suggestively***

**Goddammit. That freakin ramble I just did threw me off track and I forgot what I was going to say. Shit it was totally significant.**

**Whatever. One more thing. Sorry I know this is dragging on and on. Ok last thing. The whole she/they her/their/them thing is because while Hinata and Raku are two separate people, they still share a body. So when it's like "she did this" or "he said to her" thats because it's referring to one of the two, whichever is in control of the body. Stuff like "cracked their knuckles" and "they ran" is when they're working in unison or referring to the body. The knuckles belong to both of them and they both agree or whatever.**

**Shit I feel like a fuckin English teacher. Aight. Peace out girl scouts.  
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	4. Chapter 4

**Jitchoo: My friend you are in luck. It just so happens that there's a shit ton of violence in this chapter. Maybe not shit ton, but a decent amount. Detailed, too. You're welcome. *smug smile***

**By the way, I'm dropping the whole she/they/her/their/them shit. It was way too much work, and honestly I'm just too lazy.**

**Ok. This chapter is awesome, if I do say so myself. Which _I DO._ Enjoy.**

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**_Chapter Four_**

Gaara stared down at the picture he was drawing as he chewed the sawdust tasting toast in his mouth. One bite, that's all he ate.

His hand ghosted over the paper. He didn't even notice the rest of the world; his only focus was the image in his head being given life. He didn't even know what he was drawing. As he watched, the charcoal pencil slowly gave shape to short hair framing a nonexistent face. A girl. Deep, soulful eyes stared up at him from the page.

_No! _He tried to stop. He didn't want to see the face that he knew would eventually be complete. Wasn't it bad enough that she haunted his dreams?

Just as the outline of the face was being started, his hand jerked when a shout echoed across the room, destroying the drawing and the memories of what had inspired it.

**

Neji strolled out of his room hand in hand with Tenten. They had just spent a steamy half hour in that room, completely alone on his bed. Needless to say, they'd had fun.

He turned to look at her and licked his lips, her taste still lingering. She went bright red and looked away quickly.

Nearing the cafeteria, they released each other's hands to avoid any stupid comments from Naruto. However, that was impossible. When they entered together, the childish blond threw out a suggestive comment.

At the sound of his name, the violet-haired girl next to him stiffened. Hm. She must be new, but he couldn't tell if it was just one of those idiots, who dyed their hair.

But as the girl turned to look at him, he caught a glimpse of her familiar face.

_No…it can't be…_ And yet there she was. Hinata. Impossible, it had to just be someone who looked like her.

But as her face became twisted with hatred and she screamed his name, Neji knew that that was just wishful thinking.

**

Raku was out of her mind with fury. The second the name Neji had been mentioned, Hinata had begun to shake violently, fear suffusing the poor creature's soul.

How the _fuck _could he be there? As a part of her mind ran over every possible way to destroy the shitbag in front of her, Raku was gently soothing and comforting her friend with the other.

_Shh, just go to sleep, honey, I'll take care of this. No, no, it'll be ok. Just rest, I'll make sure he never hurts you again. Shh._

It turned out the soothing was unnecessary. Hinata had already passed out from fear. Raku's blood boiled. Her only friend was damaged because of Neji!

Oh, she was going to make him fucking _pay _for what he did. A snarl echoed through the shocked room as she stalked toward the boy who had tried to kill her violet-haired angel.

**

Gaara stared, captivated by the berserk girl who stormed across the room towards a very shocked Neji.

This was the girl he had first seen, had first developed an interest in. this was the girl he'd been unable to get out of his head for the past twenty four hours. This girl was a goddess.

Gaara was finally seeing one of Hinata's alter.

Expecting nothing more than a bitch slap and a shit fit, Gaara watched his violet-haired beauty stalk towards the frozen brunettes at the door.

Instead, when she drew back her hand, it swung forward in a fist, perfectly aimed. Neji was flung backwards from the force of her hit. How could such dainty hands cause such damage?

She stepped forward, murder in her eyes.

**

Neji was shocked to see a fist coming towards his face. Pain shot through his jaw as he was thrown to his back. He tried to sit up, only to feel unimaginable pain lance through his face.

She'd dislocated his jaw.

"Get up, you mother fucker! I'm not through with you," she screamed, so far gone with fury that she didn't even notice Tenten pounding her back. In a blur, she spun around and smacked the brunette, sending her to the ground, before she faced Neji again.

He stood, slowly, painfully, holding his jaw to minimize it being jostled. As soon as he was up, Hinata launched herself at him, fists pummeling his body. They fell backwards to the floor and she straddled his torso so she could keep hitting him.

Neji's arms were raised in an x above his face to protect it, but Hinata grabbed one, held it straight and shoved her elbow into his forearm.

It cracked and he screamed in agony. She did the same with his other arm while he writhed about underneath her.

When he was completely immobilized, his cousin paused to stare down at him in contempt.

"Neji," she said so softly he almost thought she had returned to normal. "You're going to die." With those words, Hinata gave him a cruel mockery of a smile and raised her fists.

Neji knew she wasn't lying.

**

Raku held her fists aloft, savoring the fear flickering in Neji's eyes. For as long as she had been, her greatest desire was to find Neji and murder him for what he did to Hinata.

With a cruel smile, she brought her fist down in the jaw. He gave a hoarse shout as pain glazed his eyes. Another hit, another yell.

Raku let herself go, bringing her fists down again and again, destroying the son of a bitch. She watched in fascination as his face turned a mottled blue-red under her ministrations.

She'd been purposely avoiding the nose, but she couldn't hold herself back any longer. It made a satisfying crunch when her fist came into contact with it and a nice amount of blood spattered the ground next to them. After a brief second, the delicious red liquid started to pour out of his face.

More strikes. He could barely even moan now. The skin of his face was starting to split, and Raku loved it.

She backhanded his jaw in the direction it had popped out.

He screamed. Blood poured. Raku laughed.

And then he fainted. She stood up, knowing no one would approach her to try and stop her while she was like this.

She resumed her abuse after hauling up his body and slamming it into a wall. Holding him up by the collar of his shirt, she destroyed his body, slamming her fist into it again and again.

Ribs made satisfying cracks as she hit him with more and more force, hearing nurses yelling as they sprinted towards the cafeteria. Hit. Smile. Hit. Smile.

Raku was loving it. She lost herself to the frenzy of the beating, striking out more and more, pouring herself into his torture. Raku could feel herself nearing an almost euphoric state of bloodlust, in which she was sure she would kill the bloodied brunette before her.

It drew so close she could almost taste it, just a little more…

And then the nurses snatched her away. She noted with satisfaction that she was able to fight off all five of them. This time she ignored Neji, who was being carried off a stretcher, instead crawling over the lake of blood that had gathered on the floor.

It called to her. She was helpless against it. She pressed her hands into its scarlet depths and brought them to her face. She licked her fingertips and shuddered at the flavor. She was sucked into a dark abyss, not knowing where she was, and passed out.

**

The girl gathered as much blood as she could, rubbing it all over her body. On her clothes, in her hair, on her face. But she kept tasting it, losing herself again to the heady sensation the blood created…bliss…euphoria… With a shock, she realized she was…aroused? Yes, the blood was calling to her most primal urges. The violet-haired girl let herself go, not thinking, only feeling.

A sharp prick on her inner elbow brought her back to reality with a harsh jerk. Everyone was staring at her. She glared back, growling low in her throat. They all recoiled, except for Gaara, who stared intensely into her eyes.

Hinata stared into the teal orbs, slowly losing her mind. Was it his gaze? She sunk into oblivion, the red-head's face the only thing she was able to see in the darkness that followed.

* * *

**Ok I realize that may have been at the end. Then again, it might not have. Anyway, the whole thing was Raku sorta passed out from the blood. Then with no one else to control their body, Hinata was thrown back into the driver's seat and was totally horny from the blood. Just clearing that up. There you go Jitchoo I threw a little somethin somethin in there for you.**

**You likey?  
**


	5. Chapter 5

**Jitchoo, or Jitzzle Chitzzle as I refer to you, you're my number one fan...hahah=]**

**Ok ya there was a wee bit o' sexual tension, not so much in this one. Like, none, actually. Sorry homes I just wasn't feeling it.**

**Maybe next time.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. I keep forgetting to put this. Hope I don't get sued.  
**

* * *

_**Chapter Five**_

_Whaa…? _Hinata slowly blinked her eyes open. Everything was blurry and muddled. Where was she?

Oh, wait, she remembered. The whole thing came rushing back to her. She'd seen Neji, Raku, had seized control, and then she'd blacked out. The whole time she'd been unconscious she'd been vaguely aware of her body being exerted heavily.

Raku must have done something drastic. Sigh. She was always like that, bold and rash, but also fiercely protective of Hinata and as loving as a mother. After the fight, Hinata had been thrust back into her own body once again, finding herself in a puddle of blood.

Instead of screaming and fainting like she normally would have done, Hinata had lost control of herself, the blood somehow exciting her, making her wanton with strange feelings.

Then they'd injected her with sedatives and when she woke up, there she was, lying in bed with a fuzzy brain and a spotty memory. As everything gradually focused, the violet-haired girl lifted her hand to her aching head and gasped when she caught sight of the mottled skin.

Purple and black bruises were spread across her knuckles like a stain, green and yellow around the edges.

_Raku…what did you do? _Hinata waited for an answer and was mildly alarmed when none came after several minutes. What? How?

The sedatives must be blocking her connection with Raku. She stood up, barely avoiding falling flat on her face, and blearily made her way from her room to the rec room.

As she walked, Hinata felt somewhat empty; from both what she'd been injected with and from not having Raku with her. She'd existed without Raku before, and had had her friend sleeping within her while she went about he life, but she'd always been able to draw comfort from the fact that her friend was there, ready for help Hinata when she needed her.

Now all Hinata could feel was an aching loss, even if it was numbed by the medicine in her bloodstream. She didn't know how to handle herself without her friend whispering reassurances that only she could hear.

Well she could avoid interaction. Just say she was too drugged up to think and everyone would back off. They'd probably leave her alone anyway, after what Raku had done.

Still, Hinata couldn't find it in herself to be mad. Whether it was the fact that she wished she was strong enough to do what the girl had done or if it was just that she wasn't lucid enough to care, it didn't matter.

Hinata made her way sluggishly into the room where everyone was relaxing, moving like a zombie, dead to the world and to the stares of her terrified comrades.

**

As the violet-haired girl slowly made her way into the room, everyone went silent, staring at her like she was a bomb about to explode. Gaara included. Minus the fear, of course.

He was merely curious, wondering if the girl would randomly attack and who. He hoped it would be Naruto.

But as the redhead watched her, he realized she wouldn't even be able to lift a hand to strike someone. She was barely able to remain upright.

Worry flooded him and he found himself up out of his chair and at her side as she poured herself coffee from the pot, leaning heavily on the counter for support.

"So," he stated from over her shoulder. She said nothing, barely even reacted beyond a slow turn of the head to look at him accompanied by an equally slow blink of droopy eyes. Her silver orbs were bloodshot and dull, more of a light grey than anything.

After a long moment, she finally replied with a drowsy "hello." After adding a tiny bit of sugar, she went to the fridge and got milk. Her movements were sluggish.

Gaara watched as her hands shook from the weight of the carton and he reached forward to take it from her, pouring until her coffee was a creamy mocha color.

"…thanks," was her reply after he had deposited the milk back in the fridge. Without even looking at him-her brain was probably too fried to even think about courtesy-she headed towards the exit.

"Need help?" he asked as they walked-well, he walked; she stumbled-down the hall. He guessed they were heading towards her room.

"Room…cigarettes…pier…" was all the violet-haired girl could get past her heavy tongue.

Without speaking, he took her arm and led her in the direction of the back yard. The girl was barely able to remain upright, and she sagged, only managing to avoid hitting the ground because of his grip on her bicep.

Hinata hung there for a moment before slowly sinking out of his grasp. Gaara bent down and hauled her up by the armpits, holding her till she was steady enough to move.

After about ten steps down the hallway, the inebriated girl's knee crumpled out from underneath her and she drooped to the bleached-white tiles.

_My God, this is going to take a fucking eternity, _Shukaku, who had been eerily silent during the whole ordeal, trailing behind them, snapped. It seemed he had reached the end of his patience.

Gaara agreed with him completely.

**

Neji awoke to burning pain all over his body, particular his back and chest. His eyes slid open and he stared up at the bright lights in the sterile white ceiling.

While his body was out of action, his mind was not, and he replayed yesterday's events in his mind, up until he blacked out.

Hinata must have gone to town on his body after that. Each breath was a trial he almost didn't want to continue to go through. But when he saw Tenten slumped in a chair next to his bed, he kept breathing for her.

His next breath came out as more of a pained groan, which was murder on his throat, so shredded from screaming, but when Tenten woke up and looked at him, he forgot. Her olive brown eyes blazed with worry and tears were slipping down her face.

"I thought you wouldn't wake up," she whispered in a voice so laden with heartbreak that Neji had to close his eyes against it. "It was horrible. You haven't moved or spoken in an entire week."

Neji's body was beginning to sear with pain and Tenten gave him a quaky smile before pushing the call button for the nurse. An old lady bustled in and pushed a syringe into an I.V.

Neji fought against his drowsiness so he could give the brunette next to him a tiny smile, ignoring the screaming protests of every inch of his face.

**

Hinata felt peaceful, which was probably not what she would be feeling were she one hundred percent there mentally; but she wasn't, so she did. She struggled to remain upright and turn her head, finally managing to get a small glimpse of Gaara before he body slumped and she was once again a big puddle of mush.

The mysterious redhead was currently light a cigarette for her, holding a lighter to the tip and inhaling deeply. As he blew out the smoke, he held it out to her, patiently waiting as her hand rose to take it at an excruciating pace.

Goddamn drugs.

Finally, Hinata was able to grasp the little cancer stick weakly between her fingers and bring it to her lips. She got in a good, long drag before her hand fell limply to her leg, her fag dangling precariously from her fingers.

Without a word, Gaara took it from her and brought it to her mouth so she could inhale. The nicotine was making its way to her brain, relaxing her further. Huh. Maybe she should have stopped, but she didn't.

She leaned forward and when her pink lips parted to wrap around the butt, they grazed over Gaara's finger. The brief contact with his hand short-circuited her brain, and she passed out.

**

Gaara sighed inwardly when the girl next to him struggled to even lift the cigarette to her lips. They must have given her at least twice as many sedatives as she needed. They were supposed to keep her docile, not brain-dead.

Wondering at his sudden kindness, he reached over and held the fag for her so she wouldn't overexert herself. Not that he cared, of course. He was just…shit. What was he doing?

_You're being nice. _Shukaku grinned at him as he did lazy backstrokes in the lake, heedless of the fourty degree temperature of the water.

_Shut up. No I'm not. I'm just…_Once again Gaara found himself at a loss for words. He sighed, ignoring his friend's triumphant smirk and held the cigarette out to the drugged up girl.

Her luscious mouth opened and as she leaned forward for a drag, her lips grazed his knuckle.

_Oh, God._ That brief contact with her was more than he'd had with another human being in years. He was so shocked by how strongly it affected him that he almost didn't notice her pass out.

The redhead pulled the cigarette out of the way to avoid shoving it down her throat. He watched helplessly, somehow paralyzed, as the violet-haired girl pitched forward off the pier and into the black water.

**

Raku was suspended, unfeeling, in a murky abyss.

_Hinata! What's happening?! _She cried out to her friend again and again but received no answer. Their connection was threadbare, nearly gone. Raku couldn't feel a single thing from Hinata's end.

_WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?! _Raku shrieked and screamed and raved again and again, hating that she couldn't contact Hinata, couldn't make sure her best and only friend was ok.

Feeling helpless and alone, the girl screamed for Hinata, panic bubbling up within her.

_Wait, what was that? _Raku had felt something. A tiny glimmer of contentment, and then fear and desperation had just reached her. It was barely even there, but it was something. Raku struggled to free herself from her shadowy prison, tearing at the walls and at herself.

She was frenzied with hysteria. Hinata _needed _her and she wasn't there to protect her from whatever it was. What if it was Neji, coming to exact revenge on them? No, there was no way he could have recovered so fast. But then what?

Raku fought until she was weak and unable to move. And then she curled up into a tight ball and rocked back and forth, sobbing in hopelessness and desperation.

* * *

**Sorry it wasn't that exciting, just Hinata being all drugged up and muzzing out.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Yo. Sorry it took like forever for this one but finals and all that jazz. I'm starting to have to take my grades seriously or my parents are gunna take away my computer(gasp I know I think it's horrible too) so updates will prolly be every week or every other week. Ok moving on...**

**SunaNoGaara: Aww thanks that means a lot. I guess.**

**CityLightsFallingLeaves(Jesus long name much?): Same goes to you. Oh and don't forget she pretty much had a spontaneous orgasm while rolling around in a puddle of blood. Freaky shit.**

**CadenceXofXscreams: I'm just gunna go ahead and say what's on my mind. What the fuck? For reals, I have no idea what your getting at so let's try again. Maybe in English with the words in correct order in that's alright with you.**

**=]**

**Last thing. Gotta renew that Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Duh.  
**

**

* * *

**

**_Chapter Six_  
**

From the second that those soft lips had grazed over his skin, Gaara had been paralyzed. Something in his brain had fizzed out and he lost all sense of the outside world. His mind replayed the sensation again and again, clinging to it.

A splash woke him from his trance and he glanced over at Hinata, only to see that she wasn't there.

Head whipping around frantically, the redhead looked all around for her. Wait. There had been a splash.

_Of course. She fell in. My God, you're dumb. _Gaara ignored the mocking tone in Shukaku's voice as he watched Hinata sink into the water, waiting for her to break through the surface.

_What's taking so long? _Gaara asked impatiently.

_Well…she is drugged, after all._ The other man drawled back, as if it were nothing. With a growl, Gaara launched himself into the water and felt a jolt at how cold it was. No one ever went in the lake in the months of fall and winter.

He opened his eyes to peer through the murky water. When he caught sight of her sinking to the bottom, eyes half-lidded and bubbles rising from a slightly quirked mouth, he couldn't help the tiny glimmer of irritation that she seemed somewhat amused expression. She was practically drowning for God's sake.

Even so, Gaara couldn't help but appreciate her beauty underwater. She glowed in the silvery light of the full moon hanging fat and heavy in the night sky. The glowing beams pierced through the water and slid over her milky skin. They reflected in those mirror like eyes and shone off tresses that fanned out around her like a violet crown. Her eyes focused on him and after a few seconds, a giggle escaped her lips, releasing a cluster of bubbles.

The fact that she was drugged seemed to have been forgotten. He kicked powerfully and reached out to grab her wrist, intending to drag her to the surface.

**

Hinata's mind barely registered the fact that she was underwater, losing air fast. Bubbles tickled her lips as they streamed out of her body and danced away.

A splash broke through the beautiful serenity of her underwater haven. Vague annoyance drifted through her mind, but was quickly forgotten when the violet-haired girl felt the moon's soft rays tangled them selves in her hair, caressing.

Just as her eyes were drifting closed, a harsh flash of red appeared in her vision. She fully opened her eyes to see a red-haired figure swimming toward her. It was a male, striking red hair, flawless pale skin, and a strange red marking on his forehead. A tattoo? The man looked vaguely familiar, but she was pretty sure she didn't know anyone with that kind of marking on their face.

He must have been a mermaid, from the way he was cutting through the water so smoothly. Long fingers wrapped around her wrist, tugging roughly. Jeez, what was his deal?

"Try not to break me, mermaid." Her voice sounded silly and distorted in the thick atmosphere of the water and Hinata giggled at its deep, unrecognizable sound. The action forced the remaining air from her lungs and water rushed in to take its place.

Her red-haired companion turned to look at her. _Wow…_she thought when she saw his eyes. Water was pouring into her lungs, yet the violet-haired felt she was in more danger of drowning in his compelling cyan orbs than anything.

She opened her mouth to say something else, but nothing came out. It was only then that the drugged up mental patient grasped that she couldn't really breathe.

**

_Hey what's taking so long down there? _Shukaku stood on the surface of the water, looking down on Gaara and his burden as the redhead propelled them to the surface.

Gaara ignored him and gave a strong kick, bringing them closer to his friend. The girl Hinata made a blubbing noise behind him and he turned in time to have some bubbles tickle his eyes. She released more from her mouth as she laughed again, obviously not caring that she was using up all the air in her lungs.

Suddenly, the silver-eyed girl attached to him started to loosen her grip and drift away. The reluctant savior sighed inwardly, realizing she had probably run out of air and was now drowning in the water that filled her lungs.

What an idiot.

He pulled her in front of him and shoved her towards the surface as he kicked his legs powerfully. When they finally broke through the water, she was completely limp, but there was a small grin on her face.

He dragged her over to the pier and hauled himself up, dragging her along with him. He couldn't help but grimace at how inconvenient this whole thing was as he slowly started to pump her chest.

Water gurgled out of her mouth in a continuous stream until she finally took a deep breath. Her silvery eyes locked on him and a trembling hand reached up to brush at his bangs. Not his bangs, he realized, but his forehead.

Fuck. She'd seen the marking he'd given himself.

"Mermaid," she whispered, eyes drifting shut, cutting him off from their silvery depths. "My pretty mermaid." Gaara realized that he'd been hunched over her and he stood abruptly.

_That was a pretty chivalrous move you made there, my man. Crush?_ A lazy grin was plastered on his face. He watched the two of with raised eyebrows.

"I would never get out if I let her drown." An emotionless mask settled over Gaara's face and voice as glanced at the unconscious girl lying on the wood.

_Whatever. Just keep telling yourself that. Hell, I might even start to believe you. _Sometimes Gaara truly hated his burden. At least he never became mixed up between reality and fantasy anymore.

Turning away from the sleeping girl, the redhead walked toward the large building that was his prison.

_Hey, wait! She might catch a cold. _Shukaku chased after Gaara, stopping just in front of him. Red hair still plastered to his head from his little swim, he smoothly stepped around the person who didn't exist.

"Don't care."

**

Raku's sobs ceased, and she glanced up at the sound of breathing. It was light and airy, almost not even there, but it was heartbreakingly familiar. Their body. Raku stood up, eyes narrowed toward its source, weighing the chances of it being a trick of her depraved mind.

It couldn't be. She could easily detect the almost nonexistent hitch that was so like a snore; it could only belong to them. Whenever Raku was awake, listening to Hinata sleep, letting their body rest, she always drew comfort from this tiny imperfection.

Now it gave her hope. After taking a few hesitant steps in the sound's direction, the girl broke into a dead sprint, pushing herself. Gasps puffed out instead of breaths. She was so close.

Finally Raku managed to launch herself back into her sleeping body. She sat up, a little disoriented. Pressing the heels of her palms into her eye sockets, she shook her head, trying to remove the haziness.

The pier. She was on the pier she had seen in Hinata's previous interaction with the Gaara. How had she gotten there? Raku withdrew into herself, sifting through the shared memories of Hinata's recent experiences. Everything was hazy, as if she were watching it through a screen of mist.

They must have drugged her. That was why she had been unable to resurface after falling under during her attack on Neji. The very thought of the hated boy cause her clench her fists and bare her teeth into the crisp air. A shiver wormed its way down her spine and it was then that Raku realized she was outside in the cool morning. The sun hadn't even come up yet.

During her brief glance into Hinata's-now hers as well-memories, she had seen the violet haired alter going to the lake for a smoke with the redhead, and then falling into the water. They had nearly drowned, Raku recalled with a shudder. She could feel the sensation of water spilling into her lungs; taste the clear freshness of it running over her tongue and down her throat.

She quickly shook off the memories and stood up, noting that her clothes were damp and her hair clung to her face, still completely wet. With a sigh, the violet-haired girl made her way toward the hospital. She couldn't believe that guy had just left Hinata out in the cold overnight! She could have gotten sick!

She hadn't officially met this Gaara yet, but when she did, he was in for a world of hurt.

**

_Hey man, I said it once, and I'll say it again, you shouldn't have left that girl out there._ For once, it was Shukaku being the nice guy, they one with the conscience.

_I'm going to ignore the irony of that statement coming from you and just say that she's not my responsibility so I really don't care._ Gaara's eyes never left the charcoal drawing in front of him, not even granting his friend some attention. He knew what he'd see anyway. Dark eyes staring reproachfully at him.

As if _he_ were the one who was so bad for leaving a girl outside in the cold. What about every time the boy had driven Gaara mad with his sinister whispering, driving him to hurt, to main, to kill. No, Gaara's actions didn't even scratch the surface of the horrendous accomplishments Shukaku had tucked under his belt.

Try as he might, Gaara couldn't entirely crush the smallest twinge of guilt from settling somewhere in the general region of his heart. He just couldn't forget that goddamn girl.

As if on cue, said mental patient strolled into the rec room where most of the residents were relaxing. Everyone fell silent as they spotted her.

After giving the room a cursory glance, those silver eyes zeroed in on him. Her strides were clipped and agitated as she strode over to where the redhead was sitting with his drawing. After a few brief seconds the violet-haired girl stood over him. She was still wet.

Without warning, her fist shot out and made painful contact with his cheek. His head snapped to the side. Surprisingly, Shukaku laughed.

_I can't say you didn't deserve that, 'cause you kinda did, jackass. _Gaara slowly turned to face Hinata, not letting a single muscle twitch.

"Raku," he stated, not even bothering to ask. The meek girl he had spent time with at the pier would sooner faint than consider hurting him.

"You're right. And don't act so high and mighty. That punch hurt, and on the inside, you're yelling like a little bitch." Her voice didn't sound right; it was harsh and cold. It shouldn't have been passing from those soft lips. At the moment, said lips were twisted up into a sick mockery of a smirk.

At that moment, Shizune appeared over her shoulder with a syringe in hand. Before Raku could so much as flinch, the nurse had her arm in a death grip and was steadily injecting the girl with sedatives.

As she slumped into Shizune's arms, her lips moved, and Gaara couldn't hold back a tiny smirk at what he heard her mutter.

"Bitch…"

**

Raku barely had time to blink before she felt the icy lethargy of drugs washing over her.

For God's sake! Couldn't they use some other technique to get her under control? Huh, well when she really thought about it, probably not. They'd probably read her file and knew her to be extremely adamant in her resistance to being subdued.

Sigh. It was so rare that she actually got a chance to have fun before those retarded ass bitch fucker nurses came and botched the whole thing.

_At least I got to hit that bastard. Stupid prick. _Satisfaction filtered through Raku's consciousness at the memory of her fist smashing into his cheek. _Wait, I can't leave Hinata to fend for herself! He might try something while I'm gone!_

The fading girl started to struggle viciously against the current of sluggishness pulling her to the back of their mind. No matter how hard she kicked and screamed and thrashed, Raku just couldn't break free.

Great. Now she was going to have to sit in that godforsaken prison of darkness until the damned drugs wore off. Raku sighed mentally and began to plan her revenge.

This was seriously starting to get on her fucking nerves…

* * *

**Jesus shit long ass update. Who knew I was that literately talented? They might get shorter if I start getting writer's block. Sorry homeses.**

**Um so your input is much appreciated. Thankee. Peace.  
**


	7. Chapter 7

**Yoyoyo! Sorry it took me like a gazillion years to get this up I had finals and I haven't been acclimating well to the new semester. My grades "leave something to be desired" apparently. That's what my parents said. Anyway, I won't bore you with some sob story about my family.**

**So I suffer from randomly chronic writer's block so sorry if shits all fucked up a lot. Thanks for the support homesies.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Duh.  
**

* * *

**_Chapter Seven_**

Gaara watched impassively as two nurses slipped his assailant into a straight jacket and carried her off. Shizune dabbed at his cheek with a cotton ball soaked in alcohol.

"Get off," he said, voice even and uncaring. Her hand froze halfway to his face and he took that as his cue to leave.

_Jeez, what crawled up your ass and died? Oh wait it must have been that can of whoop ass a girl opened up._ Shukaku was positively ecstatic that a girl had managed to land a hit on Gaara.

The redhead said nothing, knowing that he was completely right, and that he shouldn't have taken that, even from a girl. Never the less, Gaara kept his pace slow and calm as he walked to his room.

When he pushed the door open, he wasn't at all surprised to find Sasuke sitting there, a cigarette dangling from his lips. Wordlessly, he held out the box.

Gaara reached out and grabbed one, flicking his lighter on and inhaling deeply. Just about everyone at the "hospital" smoked. It was a better solution than drugs, which a few of the patients had dabbled in.

The acrid smoke burned his lungs, calming him with its familiarity. Already he could feel the nicotine swirling through his blood, a relaxing poison.

Sasuke glanced at his face. "What happened?" he asked, not sounding like her cared at all. He probably didn't, such was the nature of people like him and Gaara. Emotionally retarded.

"…new girl," Gaara admitted after a brief hesitation. "Multiple personality disorder." He added the second part so the raven-haired boy would know that she was violent. And insane. Well, they were all insane, so that was a moot point. He just wanted to get it across that he was in no way, shape, or form a pansy and that his face did not mean he would allow anyone to ever touch him again.

"Hn." A smirk twisted Sasuke's lips, and Gaara stared coldly at him. Without another word, he turned and left the room, hating himself for admitting his weakness.

_That stupid bitch. Why the fuck did I let her hit me? It doesn't matter. I'll just hit her back, harder._ Dark emotions swarmed in Gaara's mind as he stalked through the halls, not knowing where he was headed but moving nonetheless.

_Dude. What are you doing? _Shukaku appeared next to him and he glanced up, surprised, when he realized he'd stopped walking. The door to Hinata and Sakura's room was right in front of him, beckoning for him to enter.

_Um, I don't think we're supposed to be in here. _Despite his words, Shukaku stepped inside the small room with Gaara, watching as he moved to stand over Hinata.

She lay on the bed, drugged up and wrapped tightly in a straight jack, completely defenseless to whatever the twisted boy had planned. She was beautiful, Gaara reluctantly admitted to himself, almost sickeningly so. He had never noticed another person the way her noticed her.

Somehow, this chit of a girl had managed to make him weak in less than a week. He hated her for it. He hated himself, too.

Slowly, the redhead pulled a pair of leather gloves out of his pocket and slipped them on.

_Oh. Here we go. I thought you were going to be a little bitch about it and just take the hit. Sweet. _Shukaku sidled up next to him and rubbed his hands together evilly. A cruel smirk twisted both their features.

Gently, as if her were caressing a lover, Gaara's hands circled the sleeping girl's throat. Her steady pulse beat against his palms as he tightened his grip, causing it to beat a tiny bit slower.

Gaar squeezed slowly yet steadily, savoring the feel of her slender throat being crushed by his grip. Her pulse was slowing down, beating only once ever few seconds. Next to him, Shukaku was laughing as he watched her life slip away.

Just as Gaara was preparing for that final squeeze to end her life by crushing her trachea her delicate eyelids fluttered open. The irises were dull from the sedatives they'd given her and periwinkle stared up at him. He couldn't help but feel a little disappointed at the lack of silver shining beautifully.

Lush pink lips parted, and a hoarse whisper slipped out, so laced with pain that his tightly wrapped fingers involuntarily loosened their grip.

"G-Gaara?"

* * *

**Ok sorry it's so short. You know, cliffhanger and all that.**

**I've said it once and I'll say it again: PLEASE LEAVE A GODDAMN COMMENT! IDEAS DON'T JUST FALL OUT OF MY ASS YOU KNOW!**

**Peace.  
**


	8. Chapter 8

**Ok first off I'm really fuckin pissed because I've been sitting here typing out this nice long author's note, putting a lot of thought and effort into it and then when I try to save the damn thing, it says I have to log in so now I gotta do this whole freaking thing all over again. Here goes.**

**Sorry it took so long to update but school and I was feeling kinda out of it so yeah. Sorry. But hey, here's a free consolation prize. 8===D picture of a penis. Sorry I'm immature like that.**

**TheAweOfTheBeautifullyBroken: Thanks homes. I'm actually really flattered and glad you like it. I appreciate your support.**

**AvaOfLight: Thank you! Take notes people, cuz this is the shit I'm looking for. Constructive criticism. Thank you so much! And that's a really good idea I'll see what I can do=] you're my favorite person right now.**

**Number1Weirdo: Um. Sir. He doesn't really view her as his dream girl at the moment cuz I'm pretty sure he's in the midst of _crushing her throat._ Maybe he'll come to like her after this chapter. Hehehe...SUSPENSE! Except not really cuz it's right there. Meh.**

**I said it once and I'll say it again. PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT. Ideas, as I've told you before, don't just fall out of my ass. Sooo....get on that.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.**

**Bon apetite.**

**

* * *

  
**

_**Chapter Eight**_

"Ga-Gaara?"

Hinata's fuzzy brain sluggishly grasped the situation, including the danger she was in. Gaara's hands were wrapped around her neck while she lay there, drugged and helpless.

Within seconds she had bolted upright, now fully awake as she tried to scramble backwards and away from the redheaded murderer in front of her. His long fingers tightened against her throat, effectively holding her in place.

"S-so, w-w-what a-are you d-doing in h-h-h…" Hinata trailed off, so choked with fear-and his bruising grip- that her voice failed her. The poor girl was merely trying to distract him long enough for Raku to take control and handle the situation. However, the meek girl's counterpart was still sedated by the lingering wisps of Valium drifting through her system.

Panic overrode, and the violet-haired girl's pulse quickened to a thundering gallop as her more violent instincts-compliments of nearly a lifetime with an aggressive heart sister living inside of her.

Her arm snapped up quickly, and Gaara released her throat in order to block her strike with his forearm. While he was distracted Hinata scrambled away from him, trying to put some distance between them so she could plan her escape.

However, this only seemed to enrage the boy, as he released a hideous snarl and threw himself onto her, pinning her to the bed.

Trapping her arms above her head with one hand, Gaara slowly reached down with the other, grasping her slender throat yet again.

"P-please let go," Hinata stated as calmly as possible, proud that she hadn't stuttered as profoundly as before. Her words only incensed him further, and his grip tightened.

Cold jade eyes stared down at her, seeming to revel in the growing discomfort. Milky eyes hazy with pain stared back, memorizing the captivation color of those two soulless orbs even as their owner slowly strangled her.

Without thinking, Hinata did the only thing she could come up with to stop the redhead from completely crushing her windpipe.

She kissed him.

The free hand that had been left unnoticed by Gaara is his murderous fervor reached up and clasped his red locks-she took a brief fraction of second to appreciate how they felt in her hand, like silky blood tracing through her fingers- then sharply yanked his head down, tilting her face as best she could so that their lips met in a somewhat awkward collision. **(A/N: Holy shit epic long sentence. I'm impressed with myself.)**

Although it was only meant to distract her attacker, the violet-haired girl had to admit that her tactics were far too pleasurable for her own good.

**

Gaara ceased to exist at the exact moment the girl's fingers tangled in his hair. Her touch, given willingly, was enough to make his mind go blank. Tendrils of sensation stretched out from his scalp, swirling through his body.

Imagine his surprise when she took it a little further, giving his hair a sharp tug so that his head fell down.

Everything went in slow motion from there. Gaara could see her slightly repositioning her head so that their mouths would meet.

Finally after what seemed like an eternity, the startled redhead fell and his lips brushed against her full pink ones, effectively destroying any potential brain process he could have had. Of their own accord, his pale lids slid shut, effectively hiding his shell-shocked jade eyes from view.

Fireworks of sensation exploded inside Gaara's mind. He couldn't think, he could only feel. The soft lips that were pressed chastely against his, her fluttering heart in her throat beneath his palm.

The dazed redhead gasped against her lips, slowly moving them in tandem with her own shy motions. He trailed kisses along her cheek and jaw before coming back to once again move their mouths together.

Feelings were attacking the overwhelmed boy's mind. His head, hell his entire body, was pulsating with the feel of her lips.

He didn't even realize it, but the two of them were moaning as Hinata stroked his scalp. Gaara still held her captive, but God knew he was the real prisoner.

Urged on by some primal instinct he hadn't known he possessed, he nipped at her full lower lips before running his tongue along it to sooth the sting.

And then her flavor washed through his mouth. He nearly came with the heady taste; jasmine and vanilla and innocence. It was enough to send any man to their knees.

_Mark her._ Shukaku snarled over his shoulder. _She's ours._

"Mine," Gaara murmered back in response, so far gone in her kiss that he didn't realize he'd spoken aloud. "She's mine." The girl beneath him let out a throaty hum of pleasure at his claiming of her.

That was when the full reality of the situation hit Gaara like a freight train. He threw himself off of the bed and stared down at where she lay, completely dazed, and not from drugs.

Hazy eyes that had been half-closed with pleasure now slid open and regarded him lazily. She appeared shocked at what had just happened, but not in a bad way. The violet-haired girl was regarding him with something akin to want, and it excited him.

Before he could do anything else stupid, he growled out, "This never happened," and stalked from the room.

The one thing that had escaped his notice, however, was the tiny purple bruise forming towards the back of the girl's jaw where he had placed a delicate, suckling kiss without even realizing.

He had marked her, just as Shukaku had said.

* * *

**Hope you guys liked it. Sorry it's so short but I've got this horrible allergy coughy-sneezy-stuffy-nose-ithcy-throat-teary-eyes-all-around-suckiness migraine so I'm just not down. Hope you enjoyed it. Feedback is appreciated.**

**Peace.  
**


	9. Chapter 9

**Yo. Sorry it took like 38417587123904 bazillion years for me to get this shit up. I was kinda just like oh hey I'll write something tonight and then I'd be all like fuck that shit...but anyway, it's here now, so. Woohoo.**

**Ok so like I was reading over the previous chapters so I wouldn't write something that totally contradicted what I'd already said and I noticed that the tone has like completely changed. Is it just my imagination or am I really fucking up the story. Please tell me what you think.**

**I've decided to make Shukaku more primal and animalistic, like a demon rather than a person. It's to help justify why Gaara's still a psycho killer. Oh, and he's still Gaara, so don't expect them to suddenly be all gay frolic love.  
**

**Number1Weirdo: Sorry for the misunderstanding, _ma'am. _Did you catch that? That was totally snarky. He just might try and kill her, he's confused!(like my brother. ha. that was a joke) But I guess you'll just have to read and find out=]**

**Jitchoo: Thanks, and I don't hold it against you or anything. No it's not all that weird that you were like MARK HER or whatever. I guess if anyone here was a weirdo it would be me for coming up with that shit.**

**CityLightsFallingLeaves: She hasn't discovered her lil love bite yet, but what's the bet it's FUCKING AWESOME when she does. Dude thanks for reminding me about Neji. I maybe kinda forgot he was in the hospital(oh shit!)....sheepish grin. Do sheep grin?**

**Karma Kat 281: Thanks homes...not to shoot you down or anything cuz I really appreciate the ideas seeing how you're the ONLY ONE WHO OFFERED HELP, but do you really think Gaara would accept help from, and I quote, a "useless whelp****" who is "pathetic" and "weak"? I'm really sorry that sounded really condescending and bitchy but I didn't mean it that way. Thanks so much for the support.**

**Great now I sound like a bitchy ass-kisser. Hey, everyone just ignore me. But review. Ignore me except for reviewing.=P ...yeah, I'm a huge fan of the smileys  
**

**Disclaimer: I can't believe I actually remembered to put this shit...don't own Naruto, but if I did, let me tell you, shit would be a lot different.**

**Bon apetite. Huh. That's like my new catchphrase.  
**

* * *

**_Chapter Nine_**

"Oh. My. GOD!" Hinata's lazy daydreams of Gaara were cut off abruptly when a piercing shriek of excitement echoed throughout the room. She sat up quickly, plopping back down again when a massive head rush blackened her vision.

"What the hell did I just see?"

_Good God, shut her the fuck up. _Relief washed over Hinata when Raku's sarcastic comment drifted through her head. _Yeah, I'm back, hon. At the moment, however, I really wish I wasn't. I mean, Jesus, it's like they put us in the same room as to make me commit suicide and leave you forever._

_She's not that bad. She's nice. _Hinata defended the pink-haired nuisance half-heartedly. To be honest, she completely agreed with her bitchy counterpart.

_Um. I'm fully aware that you agree with me. I'm not a bitch, I just though cutters were supposed to be all silent and gloomy. Wait, yeah, I am a bitch. _A lazy smirk showed itself behind Hinata's eyes, and she was glad that Raku was fully herself and fully present again.

"U-um, what d-did y-you s-s-see?" The violet-haired girl stuttered out. Shit. She really hoped Sakura hadn't seen her and Gaara. Her roommate's next worked killed that hope. Hell, they set it on fire and shat on the ashes.

"You were making out with Gaara! _The_ Gaara! Don't you know he's mentally unstable? You cant just go around, kissing every crazy nutjob you find! I mean, come on! It's not like there aren't other, more eligible bachelors here," Sakura raved, arms flailing around as if she thought looking like a demented bird would get her point across.

"It was an accident," Hinata shot back, her stutter completely disappearing in her frustration. _Ok, Raku, I agree, she's _really _fucking annoying. _"He tried to crush my throat, and in movies they always kiss their attacker to distract them."

Sakura simply looked at the girl on the bed in front of her before saying, "Huh." She went over and sat on the bed next to her and grinned. "So was he a good kisser?"

Hinata brought a hand up to her lips, brushing briefly over the swollen appendages. They curved upwards at the memory of white-hot zings of pleasure when they'd connected.

"He was alright," she said noncommittally. "I'm going to get something to eat." With that, the pale-eyed girl stood up and strode from the room.

Her roommate sat on her bed, staring after the normally shy girl before moving over the secret compartment in her small wardrobe and pulling out her most prized possession. "Oh, man," she whispered to herself, shaking her head while she moved to their mini adjoining bathroom. "That girl has it so bad."

She was still smiling as she stood over the sink, dragging the sleek steel over her wrist. She was still smiling as she watched the silky red pearls well up from her skin and slip silently down the drain.

**

_Kiss. Kill. Kiss. Kill._ Shukaku hissed the words excitedly, wanting more of both things. The redhead steadfastly ignored his demon's fervor. He strode out to the edge of the pier and lay down on the smooth, sun-warmed planks of wood.

His traitorous mind kept flicking back to the sensation of her lips moving with his, to the tiny mewling sound she'd made and how it had slithered into his ears and down to his groin. He gnashed his teeth in frustration, gripping his head and trying to rid himself of the images plaguing him.

No more. He'd promised himself no more. Especially after _her._

A snarl broke free from his throat. A new, different kind of memory wormed its way into his mind and he curled up on his side, trying to fight away the pain of what he'd done. He'd loved the girl, his beautiful Yashamaru. At least, he'd thought he had. Would he really have strangled the life out of her, reveling in every second of her silent agony, if he truly did?

Doubts and self-hatred plagued his mind. Shukaku took form in his head, prowling back and forth, demanding that he return to the useless whelp and kiss her senseless once more.

_I would have thought you'd prefer it if I just tore her heart out,_ Gaara thought bitterly at the bane of his existence. He hated the disgusting thing for all it did to him. For all it made him do to others.

_Want. Kiss. Ours._ The fiend hissed back angrily. It was desperate for Gaara to go back to that girl, to kiss her and touch her once more. It wanted them to drown in her kiss. To drown in her blood.

"SHUT UP! SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GET OUT OF ME! GET OUT!" The tormented boy screamed. Everything he'd ever felt and kept inside, every piece of hate-for the demon and for himself-came pouring out of his body as he howled at the sky, at Shukaku, at himself, at anything that would hear his anguish. By the time the nurses showed up brandishing their needles full of liberating fluid, all that was left of his voice was a hoarse whisper.

When they finally reached him, he held his arm out like an obedient puppy, begging for the reprieve only its master can grant it. As his faceless savior held his arm still to press the metal into his skin, Gaara's entire body convulsed with a horrible dry retching. The haunted boy coughed again, shredding his already ravaged vocal cords. The nurse thankfully took the initiative to pump the coveted fluids into his bloodstream. Soon he would fade away into the blackness, a welcome haven that Shukaku could not reach, and would never be able to.

The last thing that Gaara saw before he passed out was the gleaming wetness of his blood that had torn its way out of his body along with his agony.

**

Whispers hissed their way into Hinata's ears, still somewhat muffled by the drugs. She strode through the rec room to the fridge, pretending not to notice. Just as they pretended not to notice her presence. She pulled out an apple from the fruit drawer and straightened as she turned around, only to take a step back with the red fruit halfway to her mouth.

The blond boy from her first day was standing right in front of her, an idiotic smile lighting up his features like a million watt light bulb. Hinata stared at him, unsure of his intentions; she could always fight him if he tried anything, but she didn't want to have those disgusting chemicals forced into her body again.

_Raku, do I do?_ The pale-eyed girl kept her face carefully blank while her other half instructed her to not do anything.

"Hey, Hinata! Where have you been? I thought maybe they'd relocated you and you hadn't even said goodbye…" At these words the exuberant blond pouted so deeply that Hinata smiled reassuringly at him.

"O-oh i-it was n-nothing. Th-the drugs h-h-had a w-w-worse eff-ff-ffect o-on m-me than I th-thought th-they w-w-would," Hinata stuttered with another smile.

"Well, good, 'cause we've all missed you even though you're new, and not really a part of our group yet. And even though you went psycho and tried to kill Neji," Naruto was practically yelling in her ear as he dragged her over to join the others. They all looked at her a little warily, but otherwise welcomed her in their cozy circle.

"Hey, Hinata! I was wondering where you'd gone," Kiba smiled playfully at her before returning to the video game he was playing against the emotionless one, Sai. "Give it up, Robot! I own at this!"

"It seems that you are incorrect, as I seem to be winning," the blank-faced boy stated flatly. Hinata approached the sofas to sit down. The first one was occupied by Chouji, Shikamaru, and the twig of a girl called Ino.

She glanced at the other one, which appeared full, and contented herself with sitting n the floor. However the dark and brooding one, Sasuke, moved slightly to widen the gap of space between him and the arm of the couch. Ino glared hatefully at her as she sank down into the cramped space and was pressed slightly against Sasuke, who didn't even seem to notice.

"You know, Sasuke," the blond began in a hideously flirtation voice. "I've always thought that whenever girls acted violent, it was just _so manly._" Raku bristled at the blatant insult. Did this girl feel threatened by her? There really was no competition, seeing how Ino would never be able to have the boy next her and Hinata really didn't want him.

_Still, that bitch is going to pay!_ Raku snarled. Hinata agreed that she did indeed need to learn a lesson, but she hoped Raku wouldn't hurt her. _No worries, baby. I'm just going to tell her exactly how ugly she is._

Hinata allowed Raku to gently guide her into the passenger seat while Raku took control. "That's strange; because I've always thought that being a hideous piece of skin-and-bones white trash that desperately throws herself at a guy that clearly doesn't want her was just _so pathetic_," Raku said conversationally, ignoring the blonde's cry of protest.

"You fucking bitch!" she shrieked, throwing herself out of her seat at the calm violet-haired girl, hands outstretched into claws. Her harsh yell was abruptly choked off as she found herself standing there, arms still outstretched, with "Hinata" standing before her with a hand wrapped around her throat. She clawed desperately at the arm attached to the hand slowly choking her.

"You know, I've killed people," she said, just as casually as before. She inspected the fingernails of her free hand as she added, "I've done it lots of times. I could crush your windpipe right now. You'd be dead in five minutes, and I'd watch your face twist with the pain of suffocation."

She tightened her grip for good measure and stared coldly into terrified blue eyes. "But I won't. I promised Hinata I wouldn't kill anyone, and that's the only reason you're alive. Keep in mind: I protect my own."

Raku released the girl right as her pupils pinpointed, signaling how close she was to dead. The pathetic blond sank to the floor, cowering as she crawled away from her attacker. Pale eyes meet each and every gaze in the room.

"So now you know. Hinata is my heart sister, and I would do anything for her." With that, she strolled away, stopping in the doorway. Without turning around, she said, "I'm Raku, by the way," and continued on her way.

Blood rolled down her arms and dripped from her fingertips from where Ino had scratched at her in a desperate attempt to escape. The red liquid splattered on the floor behind her like a macabre trail of breadcrumbs as she made her way to the pier.

* * *

**Yeah so shit's gotten kinda more blood related for some reason. Eh whatever. Ok. Please, PLEASE, don't tell me who Yashamaru is and how I got it wrong. I'm fully aware, and I will cyber bitch slap you. But besides that, if you even had a problem with it, what did you think?**

**Autobots, roll out!  
**


	10. Chapter 10

Ok fuck bold for the A/N. Soooo....sorry it's taken like forever and blahblahblah. Ok whatever this chapter may kinda suck, more focuses on Sakura. Don't know why. Who cares I'm so high right now and I just pounded this shit out right after christening my new bubbler so fuck that shit. Aight.

Jitchoo: Took me about 20 minutes to get through the novel you wrote me. Thanks, man. Or whatever. Don't actually know what that said. I get your meaning though. I'm trying not to change it up but I'm like retarded kinda. Also, this is a high post so EVERYONE TELL ME IF I SHOULD JUST DELETE THIS SHIT AND HAVE A DO OVER FOR CHAPTER TEN. That is all.

Shadowed Nightshade: I'm not one hundred percent sure if you got the memo, but they live in a mental hospital. Not much to do. Oh and they're really outdoorsy. Like REALLY FUCKING outdoorsy.

kickingthingsisfun: Oh you are a lifesaver. Any time you wanna like help me out with the whole mental patient profile feel free cuz I'm not, so I'm not entirely sure how to portray them. Thanks=]

Number1Weirdo: Well that's ok. Water under the bridge and all that shit. So here goes. Thanks. That was gay not sure why I said here goes. Oh and here's a real snarky comment: wow! Ino learns a lesson and they find out who Raku is? I didn't even notice that while I was reading! Geez what would I do without you to analyze this for me it's just so complicated! Thanks so much for the help!---alright end of snarky comment. No really ahh luhh yahhh. Bye.

Jen4ever10: Fucking cocks I've got carpal tunnel! This was directed at everyone after this boat load of typing I jsut did. Thanks for the support homes.

Alright. People this is such a shit post don't even start reading this believing it will bear any semblance to a quality story. Thanks. Bye. Review. I'm stoned. I tried to get my dog high but he kept freaking out from the smoke and I didn't wanna hot box him cuz the smell would never go away. Any one have advice on how to get a dog high?

Don't own Naruto.

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Chapter Ten

_Who the fuck does that stupid bitch think she is?! _Raku fumed as she stalked through the halls, not even noticing where she was going. Hinata's weak attempts at soothing her were in vain; once the violent girl got angry, she needed to vent.

_I'm sure it was just a misunderstanding,_ the dormant psyche began gently. _She lacks self-confidence. Like all anorexics. _The kind words fell on deaf ears. The furious violet-haired girl continued to move aggressively, shaking her head in anger before stopping abruptly, a flash of pink catching her eye.

"Sakura?" Raku asked as she stepped towards the pink-haired girl who had walked right past her in a daze.

The girl turned at the sound of her name, and Raku was somewhat taken aback at what she saw.

The front of Sakura's white shirt was stained red with the blood seeping from her wrist where it was clasped against her chest. Her skin was pale; ashen, almost, but her face glowed with content. Her chapped lips curved gently with a kind of peace Raku would never know, and her eyes were alive.

Raku thought that were there enough blood for it, her room mate's cheeks would be flushed with happiness.

"What the fuck?!" she cried, alarm passing from Hinata to her. She stepped forward and tugged on Sakura's arm to get a better look. A long shallow gasp ran up her arm, lethargically seeping blood. "Oh my God, are you ok?"

Bleached lips parted in a serene smile. "I guess you weren't paying attention when Kiba told you about my condition?" Her deep emerald eyes were warm with amusement. She tried to turn away, but Raku caught her and dragged her down the hall.

"Where are we going?" Sakura's voice was slurred from blood loss, but she seemed so happy. Raku just couldn't figure it out. "Please don't tell them," she pleaded, suddenly somber. "They'll make me take more medicine."

"I wont. I promise." The violet-haired patient knew exactly what type of "medicine" they administered there, and she wouldn't ever wish it on someone else. "So I guess this is your own personal demon, huh?"

"Oh, no," Sakura shook her head, emphatically, then stopped walking and laid her hand on the wall to steady herself against the dizziness that pounded through her skull. After a while they resumed walking and Raku pulled her into their bedroom as soon as they reached it. Once inside, she flipped the lock and yanked Sakura into the bathroom, locking that door, too, just for good measure.

As the silver-eyed caretaker rinsed her arm gently under the water, Sakura elaborated on her denial. "I've always felt so cold and empty, but one day I fell down, and I cut myself. I didn't even realize how bad it was until my mom started screaming, because all I could feel was…_alive._" She breathed the last word like it was holy, not meant for the ears of a mere mortal. "My demon sucks out my soul, and my blade brings it back, even if it is only for a little while."

After that they both fell silent, contemplating things that neither needed to share. Raku swiftly wrapped Sakura's arm in a bandage, securing it tightly.

"Listen, Sakura, I know how it is, to be empty and wanting something you can't obtain. But promise me this: you won't damage yourself too much. Please don't take it too far, to a point you can't come back from."

Sakura smiled, and placed a freezing kiss on the other girl's cheek. "I promise," she whispered, echoing her earlier words. "But you may want to think about the damage you're doing to yourself before you worry about me too much."

And with that, she quietly left the bathroom to enjoy her soul while she had it, leaving Raku and Hinata alone to consider what she had said.

**

Sakura stepped from her bedroom, sporting a hoodie to hide the evidence of what she'd done to herself. She strolled down the hallway, content with the feelings coursing through her. They felt so amazing, even the pain radiating from her cut was heaven compared to the numbness she'd been suffering through for so long.

However, nothing could last forever, and Sakura's sharp cry of protest echoed around her when she felt the feelings slipping away.

"No! No! _NO!_" she screamed and beat her arms against the wall, hoping the pain would keep the feelings from leaving her. As she flailed helplessly, she failed to notice the lone figure traveling towards her, hands buried in its pockets, before they retracted and caught her wrists to keep her from shattering her bones.

"Sakura." The pink-haired girl stiffened as she recognized the voice. Of course_ he _would be the one to find her like this. His statement of her name had held a question, and she knew he wanted answers. She winced when his finger tightened at her silence, then smiled when she realized she could still feel the pain.

She must have sucked in a breath or something because his hands suddenly removed themselves and she turned to find him standing there with his hands buried in the pocket of his sweatshirt. She could feel blood beginning to seep from her cut-she felt like an idiot for beating the crap out of her arm and undoing Hinata's work-and she tried to think of a way to get away from him and change the bandage.

"Oh, nothing," she said, slipping back into her emotionless self with the pain gone and her soul sucked away once again. She didn't miss the way his eyes zeroed in on the dark stain that was barely visible on her black sleeve. "I just had a lapse in judgment." With that, she turned away, only to feel him grab her arm again, _right over the cut._

Sakura gasped as feelings coursed over her yet again, except sharper and more powerful. She could feel Sasuke's warm hand pressing through the fabric of her sweatshirt, thawing her frigid skin.

"Saukra, don't lie," he intoned in a voice to rival hers on her worst days. "You've been doing it again." More words than she had heard from him in a long time. He was right, of course. She'd tried to stop, to be normal, but in the end her demon had gotten the best of her.

"Sakura." The word was loaded. The pinikette turned to Sasuke and shrugged.

"We all have our crosses to bear," she said philosophically. "Now if you'll excuse me…" She wrenched her arm free of his grasp and turned away, only to feel a tight grip on it once again as he dragged her down the hall.

"What the hell?!" she screeched, squirming around, but to no avail. Her dread-she was shocked by the force of the feelings still coursing through her- multiplied as she noticed they were coming dangerously close to her least favorite place, Kakashi's office.

She hated the silver-haired psychiatrist. He always seemed to be able to look straight into her soul and remain calm and rational, even when she was desperately close to completely losing it. Their sessions together almost always ended with her shattering those goddamned snow globes he kept perched on every surface but the lounge and the floor.

When the pair reached the door with its hideous gold filigree announcing whose office it was, Sasuke wrenched the door open and shoved it inside, wiping his hand furiously on his sweats.

As Sakura turned towards him, now void of feelings, she noticed the red smears of her blood painted across his hand and pants.

"Ah, Sakura. I was under the impression that our next session was tomorrow. How filly of me to forget," he mused, but Sakura knew he was just trying to lure her into a sense of false security. The man was as sharp as her razor, which she maintained with an obsession.

"You know why I'm here," she intoned, already sinking.

"I see," the psychiatrist replied. "Well, take a seat and we can talk. Then I'll give you what you came here for. What'll it be this time, pills? Syringe?" Even as he spoke he was already pulling out his little notepad with prescription papers on it. As far as Sakura knew, this was the only way he ever treated his patients in the hospital.

At least, it was the only treatment he ever prescribed for her.

"Pills. Have the nurse bring them by later." The door was already shutting as the still-bleeding girl strode from the office, leaving a trail of red behind her.

Sakura felt a familiar hollowness in her chest as she reflected on the irony of her problems. Funny how the only things that made her "happy" were also the only things that made her sad.

* * *

SHITTY CHAPTER I DON'T NEED YOU TO TELL ME THAT. CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM IS ALWAYS NICE THOUGH.


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